The Supervillain Guidelines

In my quest for World  Universal Domination, I have learned from the mistakes of other evil overlords and have compiled a list of guidelines that will ensure my success as a Supervillain.

  1.  I will not be seduced by the Heroine with the Rockin’ bod. (however I may be seduced by the Hero with the Epic Beard), No one is perfect.
  2. I will allow my henchpeople to unionize and treat them fairly so that they are less likely to betray me, after all a stable workforce is a helpful workforce.
    2.a) This means I will not send my henchpeople to their certain doom without the proper benefits packages.
  3. I will ensure that any and all gloating monologues are said only after my Dastardly Plan has been completely and irreversibly implemented.
  4. My Dastardly Plan will feature no overly dramatic Rube Goldberg-esque start up sequences that can be easily stopped with the slightest interference, after all efficiency is its own reward.
  5. My Doomsday device will not be revealed until after the apocalypse. If no one knows of its existence, it cannot be stopped.
  6. I will ensure the general public understands that I shall be a benevolent overlord, I only have their best interests at heart. This will help prevent any uprisings and/or rebellions.
  7.  Any prophesy, vision, tapestry of fate, or precog, predicting my downfall shall be sealed away, hidden from the general public, and appropriately prepared for.
  8. I shall not let the infinite power I wield go to my head. Or my Ego.
  9. I shall remember my  humble beginnings and look back on these guidelines often.
  10. Above all else, any and all plans shall be reviewed by a team of small children. Any flaws that these children discover shall be rewarded with espresso shots and puppies.  After the flaws are fixed I shall have the perfect plans.


With the hundreds of thousands of refugees from Syria trying to find a better life this poem goes out to their struggles and suffering.


Oh we won’t fight, and we won’t fail for we will suffer in the end. Yes we won’t scream nor will we flail when they crush our bones to dust. For suffering it’s all we know, just broken hearts so full of woes. In the end, it’s all we’ve got,

So pick us up, we’re already down. we need your help to keep on going because suffering, it’s all we know. In the end we’ll keep on going. but wouldn’t it be kinda nice to catch break instead of falling through thin ice.

So pick us up and we’ll be here to help you out when you need it. Suffering it makes us strong, Though our bodies are scarred our will remains. because in the end, oh in the end it’s all we know.

please fix our hearts and heal our wounds, we will remain here for you. If you don’t well that’s okay, we’ll be here anyway,

Hearts broken, bones crushed, bodies scarred  we will be here in the end because we know one way or another, the suffering will end.


Oh My Glob! (A cocktail)

Today at Crazy Wicked Awesome I’m combining two of my favourite things, beverages and cartoons with the Oh My Glob!

This is a major departure from what I’ve done here in the past, I’ve never done recipes before! Hurrah for learning opportunities!

I’m not much of a bartender. I  love mixed drinks but I prefer to keep things as simple as possible, case in point: My favourite drink is a screwdriver. This simplicity is why I was so excited when the OMG turned out so yummy!

The Oh My Glob! is incredibly easy to mix, All you need is Vodka, Sprite (or club soda), Ice,  Frozen Blueberries and Berry Puree!

A Fruity cocktail!
A Fruity cocktail!

Doesn’t that just look perfect for her lumpiness?

To mix the OMG just take an ounce of vodka, either chilled or poured over ice and the frozen blueberries for lumpiness.

then add some berry purée for to get the colour and source of the flavour, I used some store-bought blend because I don’t own a blender, but if you’ve got one, I am going to suggest plums, raspberries and strawberries for that nice LSP colour!

Add dash of Sprite or club soda for fizz and you have yourself a delicious treat!

To make a kid friendly version, replace the vodka with club soda and now you have a healthy snack the whole family can enjoy!

Nectar of the Gods

My Love Letter to Caramel Macchiato

Dear Caramel Macchiato,

You may not remember the first time we met, but I do.
Scott Pilgrim had just ordered one of you,  You had no idea at the time, but that was the start of my obsession with you., so sweet and yet, so exotic,  I knew then and there that we would be life-long partners, or at least, partners until I developed Diabetes Type II.

It was some time later, after many sleepless nights and restless days, that I was finally able to taste your deliciously creamy soul.

You were and continue to be the perfect blend of sugar based confectionery and coffee bean derived  beverages, One sip was all it took to confirm my suspicions: You, Caramel Macchiato are the Mona Lisa of the coffee world! Enigmatic yet revealing hiding your dark espresso ichor beneath a glistening sheen of caramel and  milk.

You transported me to another world, away from drowsiness, away from sleep. With you and the heady caffeine rush you always gave me I was invincible! I could do ANYTHING!

I guess what I’m trying to say, Caramel, my dear, is that I love you.

I love you more than anything I’ve ever loved before, or since, even bacon.

I love the way your curvy, golden sweetness gives way to the creamy riches of your full-bodied espresso.

I love how often you change your swirls, every time we get together you have a new look, it’s mesmerizing.

I love you Caramel Macchiato, even if my parents will never understand our love,

I will always be here for you.

Much Love,


Things I do

A lot happens here at Crazy Wicked Awesome, blogs, reviews, infographics  and those are things I do but… I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing with my life. Not a single clue However, many people think that I some how magically have my life together because I snagged the most amazing domain name ever, so I’ll give it my best shot. As one final disclaimer to demonstrate just how little I know I created this handy dandy infographic to help break it down. Things I pretend to do is a whole other story.As you can clearly see, I don’t know much. I write blogs. I make pretty things. But I really don’t have any idea what I’m doing. Or maybe I do, and it just feels like I don’t who knows? Everyone says they enjoy what I do, but to me it’s just randomly mashing keys and clicking buttons until words and pretty graphics miraculously rise from the mess.  Perhaps I’m good at what I do. Perhaps not. Perhaps I do know what I’m doing.

Perhaps this is a clever satirical look at the lack of direction my generation and I’m just going on and on for fun and profit.

But let’s be real here; why would I do something as satirize current issues for comedic effect on the internet? Afterall, I am the same guy that brought you the Able-bodied Etiquette guide  and the horror that is my Steam Backlog.

I’m a millennial and I know exactly what I’m doing with my life” – said no millennial ever

We as a generation are lost, perhaps because we have so few realistic role models. Most of our parents are Baby Boomers, and well, the world was a different place when they were growing up. We as a society have never been more interconnected.  The internet means almost anyone can learn about anything or anyone. Going to school to get a degree no longer guarantees the nice job it used to. Instead it now almost always guarantees a ton of student debt.

Does anyone really know what they’re doing anymore?  This should be the question. We already have an answer; “42” such a whimsical, nonsense answer fits.

Acupuncture and you

Acupuncture; is it Right for You?

Acupuncture is an ancient, alternative Chinese medicine that is rapidly growing in popularity among Western countries.  Theoretically, acupuncture works by correcting imbalances in the body’s flow of Chi.

Derived from Latin acus’ (translating to needle) + ‘punctura’ (meaning to puncture) acupuncture involves puncturing the skin throughout the body on special areas called “acupuncture points”. Releasing Chi from acupuncture points allegedly relieves everything from headaches and cancer to chronic pain and Alzheimer’s, however scientific studies have struggled to find health benefits beyond the Placebo Effect. Whether you believe in the effectiveness of acupuncture or not, you need to ask yourself “Is acupuncture right for me?”

You will want to consider the following  criteria before you start an acupuncture regime.

First and foremost, consult with your medical doctor before beginning any sort of alternative medicine treatment to make sure that it won’t have an adverse interaction with any other treatments your doctor or specialist has recommended.

Acupuncture is relatively harmless when practiced by a well-trained acupuncturist with sterile, single-use needles and clean technique. Unfortunately, it is still the art of pushing needles through your skin mild to moderate discomfort is unavoidable.

One of the biggest risks with acupuncture is bacterial infection, so make sure the acupuncturist you chose uses new, single-use needles in a sterile and clean environment to help negate this risk.

Any health benefits that you may experience from an acupuncture treatment will be short term benefits. This means that you can’t expect one session to cure your ailments forever.  Remember that it’s a treatment, not a cure.

Science has shown that acupuncture’s biggest benefit comes  from the Placebo Effect. Essentially, the Placebo Effect  occurs when you experience health benefits solely because you believe that whatever you’re doing is healing you. What does this have to do with deciding to go through with acupuncture? If you don’t believe that acupuncture will help, it’s not going to help.

If all of that has put you off acupuncture, but you’re still interested in traditional Chinese medicine, you can check out acupressure! Acupressure is very similar to acupuncture but like the name implies pressure is applied to points on the body,  no needles required, making acupressure a noninvasive procedure that is also free from the risk of bacterial infection.

Acupuncture isn’t for everyone, despite its recent rise to popularity. If you don’t enjoy needles penetrating dozens of points on your body, and don’t already believe it will help, this traditional medicine isn’t for you and alternatives, such as acupressure, may be more appropriate. 

Acupuncture and you
The benefits of Acupuncture

Fear Mongering isn’t Helping

Time for a little perspective here. Recently people have thrown around the words “terrorism” and “terrorist” rather liberally. This is inappropriate fear mongering. Be thankful that so few people died or suffered injuries  as a result of recent incidents, be thankful that we live in a country, where this sort of event is shocking and horrible and unexpected. Don’t blow it up out of proportion. Push back against legislation that strips us of our civil liberties under the guise of “stopping terrorism”. Do people really think that if we have enough laws against something that it will just end?

I am not trying to defend people like this, but jumping straight into “terrorist kills soldier, attacks Parliament” isn’t doing anything but spreading fear and uncertainty.

Law enforcement says they are unclear of his motives, can’t find anything that demonstrates he had help from another party. Yes, he was radically religious, yes, he had a history of drug addiction, and even a criminal past, but I’d like to stress again backed by a quote from the New York Times “Investigators have said they do not know whether he acted spontaneously or deliberately, or why.”

His own parents seem to have no idea why he  was driven to do such a thing.  Below is a statement they have written in response to inquiries from the Associated Press:

Hi, I am writing this note on behalf of my husband and myself. No words can express the sadness we are feeling at this time. We are so sad that a man lost his life. He has lost everything and he leaves behind a family that must feel nothing but pain and sorrow. We send our deepest condolences to them although words seem pretty useless. We are both crying for them. We also wish to apologize for all the pain, fright and chaos he created. We have no explanation to offer. I am mad at our son, I don’t understand and part of me wants to hate him at this time. You write that our son was vulnerable, we don’t know, we (he) was lost and did not fit in. I his mother spoke with him last week over lunch, I had not seen him for over five years before that. So I have very little insight to offer. We don’t wish to be part of any media circus, we don’t think it will add anything to the conversation. Please respect our privacy although many may not feel we deserve any … Once again we are so sorry. -Susan Bibeau and Bulgasem Zehaf

Does that sound like the voice of someone proud of their child’s actions? Does it sound like someone who deserves  threats, attacks, and harassment because of their religion?

As for the events in Montreal, Harper was quick to condemn the event as a result of a call to arms from radical Islamic groups, even though that has not yet been proven. So why give groups like ISIS and Al Qaeda the opportunity to take credit for it by branding it “terrorism”?

Fear mongering isn’t helping anyone, so knock it off. Quit threatening people who are different, be it in faith or ethnicity or what ever other criteria. Quit calling for increased laws at the cost of civil liberties. Don’t fall for click-bait headlines. Do your research. Yes, it was a tragedy, but the loss of our civil liberties is an even greater one.

The Physical World

Death From Above 1979: The Physical World

One of the greatest Canadian acts of all time, Death From Above 1979 has finally released their second album The Physical World it is a glorious, notorious, noisy and much welcomed return to the music world. I recently got my hands on the ultimate bundle edition of their new album and it lives up to the decade of hype! Bear with me while I review The Physical World!

Super Ultra Mega Crazy Collectors’ Edition*

Swag included Crazy Wicked Awesome
Everything in the Ultimate Bundle

* AKA The Ultimate Bundle

The Ultimate Bundle of The Physical World retails for almost $90 but is almost completely worth it. In addition to the epic new album you get: A set of 12 vinyl stickers, each a track from the album, A DFA1979 T-shirt, Physical World patch, Elephant Head Pin and Belt Buckle. To top it all off, it includes a Physical World Poster signed by the band! The one downside to this bundle was the way the packaging was handled, my stickers ended up sticked to the print on the shirt which caused some major wrinkling, and my CD wasn’t included with the rest of the swag. Fortunately the fine folks at Kill the 8 were nice enough to replace my sticker sheet and send my cd free of charge after I tracked down their customer service.

The Physical World

The album itself is unassuming, a plain red disc with the band’s name, and album title. I was pleasantly surprised when I stuck it in the player and the loud, proud noisy sound that put Death From Above on the radar with 2004’s You’re a woman, I’m a Machine started up. The Physical World is eleven tracks, with a running time of just over a half hour. In a slight departure from their past work, tracks like  Gemini and White is Red give the album an interesting pop twist.  Death From Above 1979 claimed that their new album would be different from what they’ve done in the past, and it is, but in a good way. Kind of like how cupcakes are different from cake, but not really. One important thing to note was that the digital album I received for The Physical World  was mp3 at 256kbps so if you’re an audiophile, you’ll want to rip your own copy.

The Final Verdict

If you’re a long time lover of the dynamic duo, or new to their sounds, The Physical World is worth every cent you choose to spend on it. You can pick it up, along with all kinds of other DFA1979 Swag from Kill The 8 Here, stream it from Google Play Here, and pick it up from iTunes Here.

Something For Everyone